Use E-mail Filters to Save Money

Most of us avoid signing up for e-mail lists because we don't want a bunch of commercial advertising cluttering our inbox. Besides, we know how advertising works. The more we look at advertising, the more we're tempted to buy things we don't really need.

But avoiding e-mail subscriptions to the stores and restaurants we frequent also means we are missing out on exclusive deals and coupons -- ones that aren't available on RetailMeNot.

I think you can have your cake and eat it too. The solution is simple. Here's what you need to do:

• Sign up to receive e-mails from all of the places where you shop or dine (or might like to shop or dine if you had a decent coupon).
• Set up e-mail filters  to automatically "skip the inbox" and categorize these incoming e-mails as coupons. (Gmail users can learn how to use filters here.)
• Click on the label/folder to find new e-mails before you go out to eat or shop.

Here's an example from my inbox:

As more retailers offer mobile coupons (i.e. coupons you can just show on your phone instead of printing out), e-mail filtering will become even more helpful -- at least if you have a smart phone. You can just scroll through potential coupons on your phone once you're at the store -- no need to remember to print them before leaving home.

Hopefully this strategy will help a few of you save some money. If you have questions or other good ideas for saving money, please feel free to leave a comment.

Transparency and Steadfast Love

Eleven months ago today I had a D&C.  I had found out five days before, when expecting to see the sweet moving form of a seventeen week old baby in an ultrasound, that #7’s heart had already stopped beating.

In prior years, I’ve had my ACL replaced, my wisdom teeth extracted, and six natural labors and deliveries. None of these prepared me for the incredible pain and long recovery my body would go through due to the second trimester D&C. And none of the major life pains and losses we had previously endured prepared us for the loss of this precious life, and all the hopes and dreams attached to our youngest child.

Over the next several months of dark grief, we keenly felt this loss and there have been many days I’ve longed for heaven and many nights that I’ve wept in anguish.  My sweetest comfort in the darkest moments have been the assurances that my God knows the pain of such loss and that, despite my failure to come close to the holiness of His Son, He loves me as His cherished daughter and sees me with the righteousness of Jesus – the Son He watched die for my sins.

The clearest lesson that God impressed on my heart over the darkest months that followed was that He wants His people to be transparent.  The Bible contains a lot of “one anothers” — Love one another… pray for one another… weep with those who weep. Rejoice with those who rejoice. Share one another’s burdens.  How can we do any of these things if we don’t know what is going on in each other’s hearts? How can anyone know what is going on in my heart if I don’t share?

I’ve stretched myself to share our pain when I wanted to hide or pretend it wasn’t there. I’ve talked about #7 to people without knowing how they would respond. I’ve listened when people have said dumb things, warring with my heart to assume the best of their ignorance. And God sweetly comforted our hearts this past year with those of you who grieved with us.  You valued our precious baby – a baby that society counts as expendable – when you wept with us.  You loved us and carried some of our grief for us. When you continued to care for us and listened to our pain long after the “acceptable grieving period” had passed, you showed us the very heart of God.

A couple dear friends lost their five-year-old to cancer five months ago.  Logan, a precious, life-loving child who had stolen our hearts, love, and prayers, went to heaven six months to the day after we found out that #7 was already there. His loss, again, shifted my view of life on this earth and made me long for a day where there would be no more pain or tears or death.

A Facebook post that Logan’s mama wrote yesterday made me think that I still have far to grow in this whole transparency area. 

In many ways, I’ve lost some of my transparency these last few months.  I don’t want people to think that I’m not incredibly grateful for the many blessings God has given us. I don’t want people to think that I’m comparing my loss, pain, and fears to theirs.  I don’t want people to misjudge my heart… or even judge it correctly.  And I don’t want to be the one who is hurting or cause others to hurt unnecessarily. I know the path that God has chosen for others makes mine look like a piece of cake.  I don’t want to fail to see that.  And I don’t want others to think that my heart is not breaking for them, too, as I have such sweet gifts that others still long for.

We still miss #7. I don’t know how many times I’ve heard David whisper his head count this past year: “4, 5, 6… feels like someone is missing.” “Doesn’t the house feel too quiet for some reason?” A couple weeks ago, when David and I were driving on our getaway vacation, I distinctly remember looking over my shoulder to check on the baby in the backseat. I had to shake my head at the realization that there was only luggage and an ice chest back there.  When we had first started thinking of this trip, we had expected to have a six-month-old baby along.

Some friends know the continued pain the loss of #7 has wrought in our hearts… how we have desired another baby, all the while knowing that another baby would not change the reality of this loss or even how our children now have a whole new view of the fleeting reality of life. Some friends have watched me battle with my heart, knowing that God opens and closes the womb, as I’ve watched my body stay out of whack after the D&C. 

David and I don’t have a set number of kids we want to have. We’re kind of just playing it by ear, seeing what life brings, knowing that God makes babies, and He knows what He’s doing.  But my heart has ached at the thought that maybe #7 was the last baby I would carry. I certainly didn’t want our family’s count to end on that note.

These are all things that are still hard to share sometimes, especially in light of the legitimate burdens others already carry. But I also don’t want people to think that I simply love God because my life is so beautiful.  David and I have gone through some really tough situations these past few years. We’re still going through some difficult things.  Yet God has been kind to show us His mercies in many ways that we continually fail to deserve.  He is a kind, gracious, generous God.  He’s given us His Son, adopted us into His family, and has taken care of us in ways that only the King of Kings and Lord of Lords could.

And, on top of all of that, He’s blessed us with another baby, due in March. We continue to miss #7. We continue to battle fears for this next baby. But we’re blessed by His kindness.  And we’re blessed by our children’s excitement for this next baby, and even the transparency they have as they share their fears and cares for this wee one.

“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is your faithfulness.”

 Lamentation 3:22-23

Pacific Northwest Photos

Christina's and my tenth anniversary isn't until later this month, but we've taken the liberty of starting the celebration a few weeks early.

Here are photos from our recent getaway to the Pacific Northwest.

And, yes, thanks to Lila and Amy, we left the kids at home!

Video: Kittens!

The kids call them "Princess" and "Scooter," but Christina calls them "Thing One" and "Thing Two."

Video: Spray Park Fun

We took the kids and Auntie Danelle (who is visiting from Minnesota) to a local park this past Saturday and discovered that the spray park is up and running. Everyone had a blast!

Happy, Happy Birthday, SammySam!!

So your trademark hair may no longer be, but you are still as cute and cuddly as ever, our sweet Sammy!  This last year has been a kick, watching you grow in size and stature, in your ability to communicate (in English), and watching you gain interests (okay, passions) for trains, race cars, and most recently, firefighting! Your adorable "woowoowoo" firetruck imitation often reverberates throughout the house and the sweet way you try to include your baby brother "Wijah" in your repeated viewings of "Firefighter Barney" are quite endearing... if not a wee bit nerve-wracking at times!

We love your joyful heart.  Yes, you can get upset and the world certainly knows it when you do, but most often you are good-natured and happy.... and your cuddles, hugs, and kisses, combined with that scrunched nose and the twinkle in your eyes are absolutely awesome. And when you sing? Too sweet. Just too sweet.

We love, love, love you SammySam.  Only an awesome, creative, kind, generous, all-knowing God would put someone like you in our family... and we're so thankful that He did!! We pray that as you continue to grow in size and stature, you'll also grow in an unshakable knowledge that the same holy God who made you, loves you. And He made a way for you to love Him, too. We hope that you do that. With all of your heart.

Happy, happy THIRD birthday, Sammy!!

for: mom, from: Eliana

 

 

Happy Fourth Birthday, Selah!!

*This entry is two days late. So sorry, Aunt Danelle. Life just gets in the way sometimes!!*

It's been a few months since we've had a four-year-old in the house... but I'm delighted to announce that as of Wednesday, our Selah is filling that bill.

Selah, I can't begin to tell you how much you have added to our family in the way of joy and entertainment. We love your bouncy personality and the intensity with which you love us and others. You have a way of making people feel so special and loved -- you're simply delightful.

We love watching you grow and seeing the world through your eyes, and we cannot thank God enough for seeing fit to give you to us. You get so excited about the little things in life, and you are so sweet to express your gratitude. You also have quite a lot of opinions for a freshly turned four-year-old. But you share your opinions with such clarity and confidence that we can't help but be entertained by them.

I love how fearless you are when you're around me and how shy and bashful you get once Daddy is around to hold you and protect you. It cracks me up. (And I KNOW that Daddy loves being able to hold you and protect you. Please remember, as you get older, that by His grace, God gave you a good Daddy who is looking out for you and is trustworthy in his counsel.)

I'm so thankful for the grace that God has shown our family, and I pray that you will know that grace more and more, our dear Selah. I pray that you'll know how very good and loving our God is, and how He's given EVERYTHING to make a way for you to be right with Him. I pray that you'll find your rest in Him and you'll delight in His goodness more and more each day. And I pray that He'll use your delightful personality to show Himself to those who don't know His love.

We love you, sweet Selah. Happy, happy birthday!!

Meet "Love"

'The Naked Foot House' - A Timeline of Our Short Sale Purchase

In case any of you are interested (and for the record), the following is a timeline of our 2011 experience buying a house via short sale. Overall, we are very happy with our purchase and feel it was worth the wait and various headaches we encountered along the way. But we also want to paint a realistic picture of our experience for anyone who might consider venturing down this path.

February 26 -- We first see the property (a four bedroom, three bath, newly remodeled house in a good neighborhood) shortly after noon. We dub it the “Naked Foot House” after I see the seller's naked foot protruding from beneath the blankets on his bed. He had told our real estate agent he would be in the Bay Area but apparently he overslept. We make a full-price offer today. (For point of reference, we had also made offers on two other short sale houses in the last two weeks; one we withdrew, and the other we ended up as the backup offer).

February 27 -- The seller counters with contract details, and we accept.

March 4 -- The property's status is changed to contingent based on our offer.

March 8 -- The seller signs the contract.

March 9 -- More paperwork is requested by the seller’s agent and is submitted.

March 12 -- The offer package is submitted to the short-selling bank for review.

March 25 -- Seller’s agent update: “"The BPO / appraisal has been returned and we are in the valuations stage of the file. We are a little further behind than I would like to be but not too far off. I will continue keep the file moving forward. Please confirm your buyers are still in."

April 8 -- Seller’s agent update: "Our file is now in the analysis stage which usually takes about a week to 10 days. We should be getting a response in the next week or so."

April 13 -- The bank counters, and we accept. Close of Escrow (COE) is set for May 27.

April 14 -- The hang-ups begin. We’re informed that the bank will take two weeks to get us the bank approval letter to move us into pending. More importantly, we’re informed that there is a federal tax lien on the house. It is estimated that it will take 45-60 days to get this removed.

April 22 -- Seller’s agent expects the bank approval letter within the next week or two. Hmm... didn’t we hear this last week?

May 4 -- Seller’s agent update: He’s still working on the approval letter, expects lien issues to delay things by 45-60 days (wait.. didn’t this timeline start more than two weeks ago? Does the estimated number ever decrease?), and is trying to delay the foreclosure sale date of 5/23.

May 7 -- The short-selling bank asks for more paperwork, and it is submitted.

May 18 -- Seller’s agent expects bank’s approval “this week.”

May 26, morning -- The agent receives the short sale approval letter, which moves the process into “pending”; new COE is 6/20; we’re told that the federal tax lien might take 45-60 days to be removed. We begin to wonder if all time estimations belong to a continuum of which we are entirely unaware.

May 26, afternoon --We find out that the bank sold off the second during the process of negotiating with us. We’re now no longer officially pending, but still seem to be unofficially pending. The seller’s agent is confident the second bank will approve this within the next couple weeks and that this will not delay the sale, as he believes that the second bank will approve the sale before the tax lien is released in 45-60 days. We also find out that there is a state tax lien and some other lien on the house that the seller intends to clear.

May 31 -- The house we had made the back-up offer on in February sells/closes.

June 1 -- The house we had made and withdrawn the offer on in February sells/closes.

June 9 -- Seller’s agent update: he’s still working on getting the second approval and getting the liens removed.

June 15 -- Seller’s agent update: he’s still working on the second approval; IRS has confirmed receipt of lien removal package, which is under review.

June 23 -- Seller’s agent update: he’s “still working on it.”

June 29 -- We are informed that the second bank has asked the seller to bring money to the table, which caused a delay, but he has agreed to do so.

July 13 -- Seller’s agent update: he’s following up about federal lien and should be hearing about the second approval “today or tomorrow.”

July 14 -- Federal tax lien released; should be hearing about the second approval “Friday or early next week.”

July 20 -- Seller’s agent update: he expects second approval “Friday or early next week;” appraiser didn’t get bubble burst memo and valued house $200K more than worth, causing more delays; ordering demands to clear other liens off title; anticipates COE to be end of August.

July 27 -- Seller’s agent expects second bank approval today.

July 28 -- We receive second bank approval with estimated 8/26 COE.

August 8 -- Inspection/Appraisal/Pest reports done; expected COE “by end of month.”

August 23 -- Banks extend “drop dead” (date bank will take the house as a foreclosure if short sale has not closed; no extensions will be made after this point) date to 9/22; expected COE 9/15.

August 25 -- “Drop dead” date changes to 9/9; expected COE 9/6; the seller/seller’s agent “still working on” clearing title (having final liens removed).

August 31 -- We find out that with passage of AB 458, seller is not allowed to bring cash to close the deal as he had agreed to with second bank. Additionally, seller’s ex-wife is now refusing to pay off liens that she had previously agreed to pay. Seller’s agent is still trying to get second bank to agree to less to close the deal, but quite possibly all the problems will kill the deal. According to the seller’s agent, “This is a freaking nightmare deal. Every time I get one issue resolved 2 more pop up.” Our realtor says that in all his years of real estate, he’s never met a person who has gotten himself into as much trouble financially as this seller.

September 2 -- “Drop dead” date is now 9/16

September 6 -- “Drop dead” date is now 9/15; expecting answer from second bank regarding change of expectations for closing by 5 PM following the next day.

September 12 -- The second bank agrees to reduce expectations in order to allow deal to close; the seller’s agent is basically giving his full commission to see this deal close. When asked why, he says he’s doing this so he can say that he was able to close this deal. He’s a pretty big time realtor who specializes in short sales, and this one takes the cake as far as short sales go. Final liens have been cleared by seller’s mom and they are expecting the confirmation paperwork of that tomorrow. We sign all the paperwork today. Seller’s agent informs us that we may have an “occupancy” problem, meaning that the seller still hasn’t moved out of the house. We’ll hold our down payment until we know that the seller has actually vacated, so there’s still a chance that this might all fall together. Or apart. Hoping the seller will move and we can close on Wednesday (Sept 14).

September 13 -- The seller says he has a place lined up to live, but is working in the Bay Area for the week and can’t move out until this weekend. Foreclosure date still set at 9/15. Updated information a few minutes later: the seller’s agent got the bank to postpone foreclosure until Monday, 9/19. The seller says he will be out of the house by Sunday, 9/18 at 5 PM. We should be able to wire money and close on Monday!

September 18 -- Did final walk-through this evening and were happily surprised to find the owner 99% out of house. Seller said he was just grabbing the last bit of his clothing and would be out of there this evening. On course to close tomorrow at noon!

September 19 -- House closes/records at or around noon, and the title agency receives confirmation of this right before 2 PM. At 2:50 PM, I show up at the house to meet the painter and find the previous owner in the driveway on a motorcycle with a couple of his buddies. He seems surprised to see me and I ask him why he is still here. He says the reason why he is still here is because he had just gotten the phone call 30 minute before that the house has closed. I inform him that the house had closed three hours before and that he shouldn’t be here anymore. He tells me his dog is still in the house and he’ll be back in 30 minutes to get him. I tell him that is nice and that I am going to show the house to the painter. He shows up 15 minutes later to get the dog and tells me that he is NOW out of here.

Over the next week and a half, we have the house fumigated and painted; the "growing operation" in the garage is removed as we would prefer being able to park our vehicles in there over using the garage in the manner that the previous owner had. In the process of cleaning out the house, I find two smoked joints and a used cocaine straw. And a riding lawn mower. (Well, that one wasn't actually *in* the house).

October 1 - We move in (with much help from friends and family). Time to unpack!

Video: A Pink Wall and a Bed

See the inside of our new house as our kids saw it for the very first time earlier this month.

Happy Birthday, Danny!

You're FIVE!! That's amazing! Just like you, kid. You're so much fun to be around, and we just can't get enough of you! You have such a winsome personality. You love everybody, and everybody loves you. You enjoy life and life is more enjoyable, seeing it through your eyes. Even when you're picking flowers while you're supposed to be engaged in your soccer game, you do so with such delight that we can't help enjoying the moment along with you.

We love your exuberant hugs and the excitement you have over each aspect of your life. We love how you sing and dance on a whim. We love how your great big grin is such a part of your regular countenance. We love how caring and gracious and forgiving you are with your siblings. We love how you dance to the beat of your own drum and see things through your own lens.

We can't wait to see what kind of man God makes you into, sweet Danny. We pray that as you grow in age and maturity, that you'll remember what your name means: God alone is your judge. You are accountable, first and foremost, to Him -- the good, gracious, loving and righteous God who created you to glorify Him and enjoy Him forever. May you glory in the cross that made a way for you to do just that. As you look up to so many people, we pray that you'll remember that we all fall short of God's holiness, but that He never falls short.

"Delight yourself in the LORD, and He will give you the desires of your heart." Psalm 37:4

Happy, happy birthday, dear Danny. May you know this day how very much you are loved!