Saturday, September 27, 2008

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

But for the joy...

Girltalk has a great post today about how we deal with interruptions. In it, they quote C.S. Lewis:
“The great thing, if one can, is to stop regarding all the unpleasant things as interruptions of one’s ‘own,’ or ‘real’ life. The truth is of course that what one calls the interruptions are precisely one’s real life—the life God is sending one day by day; what one calls one’s ‘real life’ is a phantom of one’s own imagination. This at least is what I see at moments of insight: but it’s hard to remember it all the time.” The Quotable Lewis, (Wheaton, Ill.: Tyndale House Publishers, 1989), 335.

I've been thinking about some similar issues lately. With a baby not sleeping well the last few nights (read: weeks), I'm tired. Being in my first trimester, my body obviously needs extra rest, and often, I'm not feeling so well throughout the day. It's easy for me to start thinking about things temporally, and in doing so, I get grouchy. And defensive. And irritable. And before anyone says, "Well, maybe you just have too many kids...", let's just say, don't go there. But that's another story for another day.

Now, I know that in some ways, this is just a season. First trimesters are usually hard on me. My house is usually a wreck during this time. During this time, food is a whimsical obsession that both tempts me regularly and also leaves me completely disgusted at the concept of preparation and thus calling my husband pleading for take-out. Tired, I can get easily frustrated with the noise levels that often seem to erupt from my four "four and under".

More importantly, though, my bad attitude signals the smallness of my brain. Instead of seeing the magnitude of God's love, grace, and provision in all these events, I focus on my selfish destructive desires that are being thwarted.

My house is a wreck, but God's grace is sufficient. He has already covered all my sins by surrendering His perfect Son to the hands of sinful men to be sacrificed on the cross. Though I desire to be perfected, I don't have to be perfect. And I certainly don't have to live up to random societal expectations when God has already fulfilled within me, through faith in Jesus, all that is needed for me to be able to spend eternity with Him in heaven.

God gave me the best husband in the whole world as the (well, almost) perfect companion to navigate this season in our lives. He's sweet, he's faithful, he desires more than anything to be the man that God created him to be, all the while trusting in the finished work of Christ on the cross, and he lovingly cares for me and our children in my weakness. He even graciously picks up In-n-Out for us to get me out of preparing that dinner that I was just obsessing about.

God has created four beautiful children, and is currently forming another in my womb, that are regularly sweet, hilarious, adorable, cuddly reminders of how worth it any physical discomforts might be as we wait for this next child to be introduced to our family. Each one adds a dynamic to our family that we could not have imagined, yet God did. Truly, we have so much for which to be thankful. I LOVE my kids. I thank God that He knows, so much better than my small little selfish brain, what is best! And I thank Him for giving David and I the grace and ability to welcome these little ones into this world. This alone is nothing short of a miracle. The fact that God so chose to create these precious eternal souls through us is nothing short of mind-boggling.

And on top of all that, He gave me four sleeping children that have allowed for the time for me to sit in front of this computer and type up all these ramblings AND eat lunch! How amazing is that?

Even with seeing all this, I know that my vision is so limited in what God is doing. And it leaves me begging, "God, let me see more of You. Regularly remind me that You are so much bigger than my small focus. Change me into the image of your Son, that I might love my husband, my children, my family, and this world through Your eyes and with the desire to see Your kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven!"

Friday, September 12, 2008


Selah plans to surrender her roll as baby of the family in about 33 weeks or so. Once again, we are humbled and thankful for God's sweet provisions and blessings!

Happy *slightly belated* Birthday, Mikey!

*The Minnesota Auntie did a good job pointing out the fact that I didn't do a post for Mikey's birthday yesterday. My apologies! We're doing the whole "cake, etc." thing tomorrow, so I hadn't really thought too much about it... But without further ado!*

Happy Third Birthday, Mikey!

We love you so much. You really are a delight to us all... We love your passion and enthusiasm, all rolled into a laid back, usually go-with-the-flow personality. We love the way you play hard and sleep hard (and I love the fact that I have a hard time remembering the last time that it was you that woke me up in the middle of the night!)

We love the excitement that you express every time you see a basketball hoop in someone's driveway or a soccer ball on the front of a tshirt. We love your dimples and the way you crack your baby sister up, just by "talking" to her.

We thank God for you, Michael Joseph, and though we can't believe three years have already passed, we look forward to seeing more and more of the person that God created you to be! We hope and pray that someday soon, your greatest excitement and joy will be found in the finished work of Christ on the cross.

We love you, Mikey! Happy, happy birthday!
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